So as we continue on the journey to different types of relationships, once again I must remind you that every type of relationship requires, trust, honesty, maturity and communication. Everyone is not built for monogamy at every stage in their life. So when you’re just dating or going on dates ( refer to the earlier blog to get a definition), if you are not ready for exclusive relationship and commitment to one person, try your hand at casual dating.
What is casual dating? Well, its when you are carrying on a non traditional (boyfriend/girlfriend ) relationship, that doesn’t have the goal of becoming traditional or following traditional rules of restraint and confines, but it may lead to a deeper relationship later. Simplified its an open relationship where the partners give each other the freedom to see other people. Sex may or may not be apart of the relationships. Now before you all collectively freak out, were discussing casual dating, not casual sex, thats a whole different topic. Just because you’re going out with and hanging with multiple people does not mean you are, or have to sleep with any or all of them.
So how does this work exactly, I call it building a team. Essentially you date/go out with people based on what you need them for and what they’re good for. Now I know that sounds extremely harsh and messed up, and negative like were going to be using people, but its not, its just the best way to say it. You pretty much already do this with your friends.
You don’t rely on one friend to make you happy and give you all that you need, correct? You have a friend you go clubbing with, you have friends for emotional support, you have a friend to call for advice, you have friends you just chat with, you have friends you go shopping with, you have deep friends, silly friends etc etc
Ok when you building a team for casual dating purposes you could build it around the different types of people you like, or types of people you’ve never given a chance, or around people that like to do the things you like to do or combo of. Maybe you have a person you occasionally have sex with, a younger date that like to do wild fun things, an older date that likes classier events, someone who likes to talk current events and politics etc
Essentially when you can’t find or not looking for one good person, build you one take the best of parts you need and roll with it. Casual dating is usually about having fun and exploring options not settling down, so do so. And you can do that regardless of if you having sex, celibate, looking for a relationship, whatever. Don’t lock yourself down. The way you handle it is you tell each person that you occasionally go out with other people, what you want your relationship with them to be, what you expect, whats a deal breaker and where you want it to go, etc. Communication is still key to avoid confusion, and so is maturity to avoid jealousy. Its up to you, some casual dating relationship have a don’t ask don’t tell policy, they don’t discuss what they do with others they are dating.
Don’t complicate it remember the only person got to like your relationship or understand it is you and who you in it with and remember not every type of relationship is for everybody, but we should all know our options.
My experience, my opinion, my perspective. Whats yours?
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